"Take no heed of her...She reads a lot of books."
~Jasper Fforde


Friday, May 6, 2016

What to Do?

So, I tend to overthink things, and basically everyone who follows this blog knows this.  Anyways, there's this guy who comes to some of my library programs--I have an ongoing event series that he always attends.  Real nice guy.  We sometimes talk, but never for any real length of time.  I try to engage him in longer conversations, but it seems like we're always on different pages--when he wants to talk, I'm busy, and when I want to talk, he seems distracted and has to cut out of the conversation early.

Unfortunately, I can't give 100% attention to him because I have to take care of set-up and clean-up for my programs, and keep things in order.  But, I would like to talk to him more.  The thing is, I don't want him to think that I'm coming on to him, because I can't figure out how I feel about him.  I've creeped on him on Facebook, and I'm happy to see that he's single.  The thought of him finding a girlfriend bothers me, so I suppose there is some emotion there.  But, I just don't think I want a boyfriend right now.  I don't know.  Honestly, I haven't really thought seriously about a guy since Movie Boy (and that was when I graduated in 2013).

My mom pointed out that I should try to engage this library cutie in more conversation.  Which, is easier said than done (see above) since we seem to be on different pages.  I surprised myself with how irritated that comment made me.  I'm trying to engage him in conversation, and I'm trying to be nice and friendly, but I have other stuff I have to do, too, and I can't afford to just hang out and talk all night.  Now, if we went out somewhere, I would be free to talk, but I don't want to make him think it was a date.

The problem is that I don't know how I feel.  Part of me obviously feels something, but the other half of me is pretty guarded, and wants to get to know him better before I dive into anything.  I guess, too, my pride is bruised, since I thought I was doing things right, but clearly, my mom thinks I'm not making enough effort.  What do you guys think?

6 comments:

  1. I'm not a big fan of forcing the issue. Not any more anyway. But then again, that might be why I'm still single at a ripe old age :/
    Anyway... if it doesn't feel like you're on the same page, then ...sad as it seems ... maybe you're not.

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    1. Thanks, Steven :) That makes me feel a bit better. It's been a long while since I've had someone pique my interest, and I think I'm getting ahead of myself.

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  2. I agree that you shouldn't force the issue, but I do think you can do something. What do you know about him? Do you have similar interests that could involve an activity? Maybe you could find out about some event that you both might be interested in, and ask him if he has heard about it. Let him know that you are thinking of going. Basically give him an easy opening to ask you out, but don't ask him out yourself. If he is interested, he will take advantage of the opportunity.

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    1. Great advice as always, Robbie :) Thanks!

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  3. Doesn't hurt to try to chat with him more to see. He might wonder the same things about you.

    I met a guy... he was interesting, smart, funny but generally was not my type at all. I wasn't sure about him. We hung out and talked a lot. He was nice and easy to talk to, but I figured he would make a good friend.... over time it just fell into place with no effort at all..... We've been married 13 years. :)

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    1. Aww! That's super encouraging :) I hope that happens to me someday. I'll be sure to keep everyone posted on any new developments!

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